Tampered Reality

We know what is REAL… But where is my reality? You tampered the reality, to make me look like i am the one who has problem… Thats making me lose my sanity actually… Because due to the abuse that i am going through, my anger piled up, it clouded my brain that i am always angry at everyone who questions my sanity of course… I am very helpless… I wanna die… I told you that, i still remember what you said, “you have to accept DEFEIT… “Minsan naiisahan tayo” (sometimes we get played) I did not say this out loud because you will again choke me literally or just make me your punching bag… -who DEFEATED who? Sino ang kalaban? (who is the opponent) -sino nang isa sa akin? naisahan ako nung inutusan mo paglaruan ang CCTV so that when i check, i can see nothing, the one who stays in the closet to mess with the things inside the house and when i complain, you will tell people that i am creating scenarios with my crazy imagination… The person inside the closet? i caught on video, ABSURD!!! You said mahirap mag accuse, well i dont wanna accuse or prove who did this to me, because i know what i’ve been through is REAL… I JUST WANT PEACE i don’t wanna respond with anger anymore… honestly, at first, i wanted revenge… The most violent revenge to those who did and participated in this CRAZY MAKING inside the house… I thought i’d be happy to say “its payback time!!” But been through a lot of thinking, with my Wisdom working, i thought i’ll never find peace if i seek revenge… So i just have to wait till they stop doing this CRAZY MAKING… I will not respont to this illusion that my abuser wants me to absorb… No reaction, Complete Silence, but it is very hard to remain silent while my emotions are screaming… i will not give in to the impulse of ANGER I always remind myself that to EXPRESS ANGER to the People who did me WRONG is like being an EVIL person just like them…

Author: FilipinaLife

i am a typical filipina wife who wants to share stories i kept through all these years(considered to be taboo) because you are a Filipina wife.

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